Harness Your Power: End the War With Yourself!

When I began studying my thoughts several years ago I was S-H-O-C-K-E-D to see the amount of self-criticism, self-doubt, guilt and yes, even self-hatred.  I was my own worst enemy and the harshest task-master I could be.

No matter how hard I worked, how well I did, how successful I became -- I STILL didn't think I measured up.  Here's how the inner thoughts went:

  "I'm not good enough. I should be doing better and geting more done in a day.  I'm not a good wife, mom or manager.  I should be further on my career path than I am.  Why can't I keep my house cleaner and cook better? Look at what my Princeton classmates are doing already in their careers, I need to catch up to where they are. "

I discovered that I was draining tremendous energy with constant self-loathing. 

I spent a few years being aware of these thoughts and working to consciously change my thinking.  The work is paying off.  I have grown in self-compassion and self-understanding.  I have gained energy and felt physically and emotionally better as I improved my thoughts about myself.  I am more focused on finding the good in myself and the good in others.

But, there are still subtle patterns that emerge.  There is still self-criticism happening.  I have learned to just observe the thoughts rather than buy into them.  Last week I observed myself thinking, "Trish, you aren't getting enough done. . . you should work more, be more, have more and do more . . ."  I watched this with interest.  I had to chuckle!  How could it be that after years of working to improve my thinking that there is still more work to do?

Well, there is.  There are many  layers to the onion of mental programming that I am working to re-program.  And, I am willing to work on it because I see that negative views of myself keep me from being as empowered and energetic as I desire to be. 

Why put up with any thoughts that cause inner conflict and suffering?  I choose to keep growing.  I want excellence in my thinking so that excellence spreads through every tiny bit of my life. 

How are you doing with your thoughts about yourself?  Tune in this week.  Observe your self-talk closely.  Is there opportunity for improvement?  For being more loving and gracious to yourself?  Write down what you find on paper so that you can see your thinking in black and white. 

You may discover, as I continually do, that life can feel better when I am nice to myself.

Imagine that!  What if we were all nicer to ourselves?  I have a feeling that the world might become a more peaceful place if we ended the war with ourselves.

Here are some gentler thoughts (affirmations) to practice throughout the week ahead:

I open to loving myself more each day.  I offer my best each day.

I give myself credit for all I do.  I am growing and learning.

I am an amazing creation of God.

I am willing to be gracious to myself and others. 

I release all need to compare myself with others.  Instead, I walk my unique path.

I am empowered to live my full potential.

With great courage and honesty,

Patricia Omoqui, The Thought Dr.
http://www.patriciaomoqui.com/

Harness Your Power: Break Your Vision into Chapters

The genie had been let out of the bottle.  It was stuck inside for years.  When my fear moved out of the way, something magical came about.  I discovered incredible passion inside me.  The more I kept the self-doubt out of the way, the more the genie emerged.  It grew bigger, wider, taller than I had ever imagined.

The part of myself that is made for greatness had emerged.  It was READY for life, ready to work hard, committed to achieving my dream.  My dream was to help people reach their full potential.  I could see myself standing on a stage speaking, working with groups and individuals and writing about topics that could transform people's lives.  I could see myself working all over the world.

Once my vision emerged, the challenge was that my dreams were INCREDIBLY VAST.  Idea after idea rose up from my soul.   I could see the way my skills, personality and passion could be combined to make an incredible difference in the world. 

So, where would I start?

I needed to start where I was.  What was that one next step I could take on the road to my destiny?  Many times I felt overwhelmed --there were so many things I wanted to work on, so many projects I could start -- so which one would I begin?

I discovered something important:  I had many years ahead of me!  So, I could break my dreams into "chapters" and get started.  I began by giving my next chapter a title: "Getting Started."  I needed to build the infrastructure.  It was time to create business cards, take needed training courses, get up on stage and build my network.  I needed a website, a blog.  I could take time to write on a daily basis and hone my skill.

One chapter led me to the next chapter.  It has been and continues to be a personal evolution.  The adventure is in the personal growth.  It overjoys me to see that with consistent effort, results do come. 

There are not enough hours in the day to work on all aspects of my vision so I take it one stage at a time.

If you feel overwhelmed and are unsure of where to start, try breaking things down into 90 day time periods.  Of all the dreams you have, which one could you best progress on in the next 90 days? 

Don't get stuck in over-analysis.  Listen to your inner voice.  Then, act on the guidance you receive.  One small step leads you to the next and the next and the next.  When you do this day after day, you make tremendous forward movement!

Use this motto:  I take the next step forward from where I am with the resources I have today.

If you need support, I'm here as a coach to help you clarify the next chapter so you can get started!

With a smile,
Patricia Omoqui, The Thought Dr.

Harness Your Power: Persist! Persevere!

It is a joyful process for me as a coach when a client stays FOCUSED long enough to create the results they long for.  This week I have seen an incredible "real-life movie" of a dream culminating into a reality for someone I have worked with for several years.  It is AMAZING to be on the sidelines watching, cheering, and coaching the person forward.

To get the big dreams, you have to have a "stick-to-it-tiveness."  Too many people, when the going gets challenging, give up.  They may be close to the breakthrough but they become impatient or frustrated.

Consider this: What if that one next push allows your dream to be born? 

Contemplate:  Will you find yourself looking back with regret for not having gone the length needed to fully live your potential?

Persistence is defined as the quality of continuing steadily despite problems or difficulties. 

Perseverance is defined as steady and continued action or belief, usually over a long period and especially despite difficulties or setbacks

I implore you to develop these qualities.  Persistence and perseverance are a foundation for creating true success and satisfaction.

The roads, when they go uphill may cause you to feel out of breath, but in the process of climbing your body has been awakened and your lungs have been stretched.  And, when you have reached the top of the hill, the view is quite incredible.  Your spirit will sing.

A favorite new quote I found goes something like this, "The hardest part of getting to the top of the ladder is getting through the crowd at the bottom."

The people who move up the ladder are the ones who stay focused the longest and NEVER GIVE UP ON THEIR DREAMS.

With great beleif in your power to persist,

Patricia Omoqui, The Thought Dr.
http://www.patriciaomoqui.com/

p.s. I am currently taking on a few new clients -- people who are committed to optimizing every aspect of life -- people who no longer want to settle for status quo but who want to live full out!  Please contact me if you could use my support.

Harness Your Power: Relentless Focus!

Relentless.  Focused.  Centered in passion.  Connected with purpose.  Willing to do whatever it takes to experience the thrill of living one's dreams.  Do you know how this feels?

I do.  I never would have thought five years ago that I could let go my fearful, limited thinking to wholeheartedly live my vision.  It's been a gradual progression.  The further I walk down the path to my dream-life, the more committed I am to continuing my forward movement. 

Moments, many moments, are tough.  Yet, I push through.  I persist.  And, gradually breakthroughs come in various forms--often miraculous ones.  In the moments when that inner fire feels as if it could give out, I am reignited once again.


I realize that my journey is MY journey.  It's not like anyone else's path.  So I need not be distracted with comparing myself to others.  I must celebrate and be inspired by successful colleagues and KNOW that I am on the right path, moving on the right schedule forward to being, doing and experiencing MORE of what I love.

I'm introspective today.  Just processing all of my feelings out loud is good for me.  And, I share it with you to remind you that YOU ARE CREATED TO LIVE AN EXTRA-ORDINARY LIFE.  Do so today without hesitation.  No fear.  Get clarity on what you truly want.  Take that next step.  Get the needed mentoring and support. 

Live full out.  Life is short.  Wake up to your deep desires. 

I'm here as a coach to support you in doing so.

Here are a few quotes to inspire you.  Meditate on them.  Post them in a place you will see them throughout the day.

DREAM!

"We all have our own life to pursue, our own kind of dream to be weaving. And we all have some power to make wishes come true, as long as we keep believing."

- Louisa May Alcott


STATE YOUR DREAMS OUT LOUD!

"When we are dreaming alone it is only a dream. When we are dreaming with others, it is the beginning of reality."
- Dom Helder Camara

BELIEVE.  BELIEVE.  PERSIST to the BREAKTHROUGHS.

"I have learned, that if one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours." 
- Henry David Thoreau


Dreaming with you,
Patricia Omoqui, The Thought Dr.
http://www.patriciaomoqui.com/

Harness Your Power: Cherish the Priceless

This Sunday our pastor asked that our entire congregration join in prayer for a family whose son has a brain tumor.  This four year old boy was rushed to Children's Hospital for an emergency surgery.  They did not know if he would survive the surgery or not.  He did.  Yet, his family is being told that he has very little time to live.

There was not a dry eye in the service.  We joined in prayer for peace and comfort for the family.

I've been sitting with this in my heart all week.  I have been taking the time to cherish the priceless gift of my daughters and my husband.  I am looking at them with fresh eyes--enjoying them with greater appreciation. 

I have come to this conclusion:  I could have all the money, the fame, the success but without a family to share this with, it would be empty.  And, if I don't have the money, the fame or the success but I have my family, my life would still feel full.

I ask this week that you look at the people in your life with new gratitude.  Look for the good in them.  Find the love and connection and grow it! 

It is truly love that brings a depth and satisfaction to life -- it's not the external "stuff" that does.

With love,
Patricia Omoqui, The Thought Dr.
http://www.patriciaomoqui.com/

Harness Your Power: Get Out & Network

I went to a great event in Philadelphia last night focused on Women, Empowerment and Leadership.  It was hosted at the Constitution Center In Philadelphia which is a fabulous venue.  The featured speaker was Carla Harris, author of Expect to Win.  She gave great tips for success in the business world. It was an evening full of inspiration.  To top it off, I met some incredible new contacts.

Relationship building truly is a key to success.  Having a quality, top-rate group of people in your life is a catalyst on your journey to ever-evolving success.  It takes energy to get out and network.  Remember, it's not about the quantity of events you attend.  It's about choosing the right quality events to be part of.

When you get there, relax and be yourself.  Shine.  Extend a hand and get to know the people around you.  You are a valuable professional. You have much to offer based on your unique set of experiences, skills, personality and connections.  Look people in the eye with compassion and confidence as you shake their hand and greet them.

Last evening I went to the venue alone.  I walked the room several times with a smile on my face, looking for those who I felt drawn to connect with.  With time, I found myself in many interesting conversations--I met a fellow Princeton graduate, a top-executive who expressed interest in having me speak at an event and a distinguished woman who felt the need for a life coach after we chatted for a short time about self-confidence.

Now there is follow-up to do.  It's time to connect with those I met via email and set a time to get to know them even better.  I usually schedule a lunch or a coffee so I can deepen the relationship and know the person better.  This type of connection often leads to an important exchange of information and contacts and allows me to make a new friend.  Remember the words of Peter Drucker, "More business decisions occur over lunch and dinner than at any other time, yet no MBA courses are given on the subject."

So, get out there and get to know some new people.  Offer your kindness and your contacts to others and you will find that others will do the same for you.

May growing success meet your path!
Patricia Omoqui, The Thought Dr.

http://www.patriciaomoqui.com/

Harness Your Power: You Have More In You Than You Realize!

I hit a point of exhaustion yesterday.  It wasn't physical tiredness, it was mental and emotional fatigue.  There are many aspects of my vision I have been working on.  I do see progress but I do not yet see the full manifestation as of yet.  I feel more challenged than ever before.

Yesterday was emotional.  I stepped back and took time for myself.  I needed to express my emotions and get clear about why I felt the way I did. 

Today I feel better.  It struck me that I have had these feelings before.  During my college and professional basketball career, there were many days in practices that my coach pushed us.  He asked us to do that one extra lap, that one extra push-up, that one extra set of shots.  He demanded this in moments where we were already worn down after a long practice.  And, each time he asked, I'd push forward and complete the task I was given.  It was that "extra push" that allowed me to develop my basketball skills and physical conditioning to a point of excellence.  Then, when  I would play in a game, I would have more to offer in the court than many of my opponents.

This Sunday I did an intense workout at a local gym called Crossfit.  The workout of the day was to row 1000m, do 50 "thrusters" (squats with overhead press) and then finish with 30 pull-ups.  I did great up until the point I got to the pull-up bar.  My muscles were trembling.  I wondered how I would ever complete THIRTY pull ups.  I didn't feel strong enough.  But, I pushed through.  I did one at a time, for thirty times.  Thankfully, a few people who had finished before me came and cheered me on, "Trish, you can do this.  Keep going.  Just go for it."  I did finish and afterward felt so good physically and mentally.

We are stronger than we realize.  Each extra repetition, trial and challenge that life brings us is preparation for the dreams and visions we have.  We may not like having to push through these times, but if we keep in mind that it is essential training, it makes it feel a little bit easier.

So, here I am today writing.  I know I am living my life as best I can.  I am bringing my best effort every day. I am fully focused on my vision.  And, I am committed to being mentally tough, pushing forward to achieve my dreams.  I want to do whatever it takes to live my full potential.

Don't give up.  You are stronger than you realize.  You must persist, persevere and stay consistently focused on your progress.  As you do, you will be amazed at the muslces (mental, emotional -- maybe even physical) that you build as you work-out your vision day after day after day.

I was featured last week in a blog written by Ovation Magazine's Managing Editor, Mrs. Bola Obileye.  Here is the link for your enjoyment:  http://seriouslydoughnuts.blogspot.com/2011/03/meet-thought-dr-patricia-omoquithe.html .

Staying focused today,

Patricia Omoqui, The Thought Dr.
http://www.patriciaomoqui.com/