You put on your smile and start interacting with the other guests. The voice in your head keeps chattering, "This person seems so accomplished. They seems important and well-connected. I don't measure up. I wonder what they think of me. Oh no. What I said didn't make any sense. Why can't I do better at having these conversations?"
Self-critical thinking can sabotage us. It keeps us from being relaxed and at ease. It hinders us from enjoying each moment of life. It gets in the way of a bold, confident approach to conversations.
I know about this kind of thinking because I have moments of it myself. I've studied my own self-critical thought patterns for several years now. As I observed my mind closely, I saw that I was my own worst enemy. I was harder on myself than anybody else. In fact, I'd never say to others the type of harsh judgmental words I would say to myself. I've learned that this type of thinking need not control me.
When my mind starts down these negative paths, I stop. I take a few deep breaths. I then refocus my mind on the wonderful, unique aspects of who I am: "I am a woman full of courage and love. I have gifts and talents, unique ones. I embrace and love myself for who I am. I stand tall and confident. I love learning and growing. I relax and choose to focus my mind on the good in myself and in others. I am here on Earth for a reason."
That new thinking energizes me. It ignites my inner light. It clears away the clouds of comparison with others so I can really listen to another person when I am having a conversation. I become more effective when I love and affirm myself.
This week I offer you a challenge. Take a day and observe your mind. Pay particular attention to the self-talk you have. What do you say about yourself? Are you critical? Write down any negative or judgmental things you have thought about yourself. Become aware of how often you "beat yourself up" in your mind.
Now, take your list of thoughts and transform them one by one. Consider the question, "What good can I see in myself? What gifts do I have to offer? What are all the great things about myself?" Write down as many empowered, positive statements as you can. If you can't think of any, seek some help from a trusted, loving friend.
We are each amazing people.
We become more remarkable as we honor ourselves in our thoughts.
Seeing the best in me and seeing the best in you,
Patricia Omoqui, The Thought Dr.
http://www.patriciaomoqui.com/
