Too often we take what other people say and do as a personal attack. I've learned that other people are entitled to their own opinions, judgments and perceptions. It's up to me whether I allow what they are saying to upset me or if I see what they are offering as simply information to consider.
Here's a good story I found on the subject:
A tale is told about the Buddha, Gautama (563-483BC), the Indian prince and spiritual leader whose teachings founded Buddhism. This short story illustrates that every one of us has the choice whether or not to take personal offence from another person's behaviour.
It is said that on an occasion when the Buddha was teaching a group of people, he found himself on the receiving end of a fierce outburst of abuse from a bystander, who was for some reason very angry.
The Buddha listened patiently while the stranger vented his rage, and then the Buddha said to the group and to the stranger, "If someone gives a gift to another person, who then chooses to decline it, tell me, who would then own the gift? The giver or the person who refuses to accept the gift?"
"The giver," said the group after a little thought. "Any fool can see that," added the angry stranger.
"Then it follows, does it not," said the Buddha, "Whenever a person tries to abuse us, or to unload their anger on us, we can each choose to decline or to accept the abuse; whether to make it ours or not. By our personal response to the abuse from another, we can choose who owns and keeps the bad feelings."
Are you accepting negative "gifts" from others? You don't have to. You always have a choice of whether you take in what another person offers you.
Choose wisely. Each choise affects the quality of your life experience.
With a wish for peace,
Patricia Omoqui, The Thought Dr.
http://www.patriciaomoqui.com/
But what if the negative gift comes from your boss ? What if you received a negative performance review that you do not think is correct or fair ?
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