Harness Your Power: Silence & Listening

I spent this entire week looking inside myself, learning and growing. I was reminded through some interactions with people close to me, that I want to improve my listening skills. A few days before these conversations occurred, I had picked up a book at the library called, "The Sacred Art of Listening." How is it that I always have the books I need right at hand? I'm so grateful for the way the Universe is always at work, supporting and preparing me even when I don't know what I need!

In this helpful book, I was reminded of the importance of practicing personal silence. Quieting our minds opens up space for us to BE more of ourselves. It is also an important practice in relation to listening. If our minds are uncontrolled when we are by ourselves, the mind's activity will inevitably pick up its pace when we are interacting with others. Then, when we find ourselves in intense conversations where we hold differing viewpoints with others, the mental speed ramps up another notch entirely!

Practicing silence helps us to see that we can be in control of our minds rather than having our minds in control of us. We are able to slow down the thinking mechanism and open up space in our head and our heart when we do this. Then, during our daily life, we can use silence "on-demand" to get back to peace. I often spend moments breathing each day to calm myself and regain perspective. The same can be true for using silence in the time we spend with others.

To truly listen to another person, we must be able to slow our minds down. If not, we will be thinking of our to-do list, past history we've had with the other person or the next thing we want to say to them rather than deeply hearing them. If our minds are quiet, we can graciously accept their words and take them in. Rather than jumping into a barrage of comebacks, we can sit and consider their perspectives. Then, after a few moments of quiet, we can respond lovingly to what they say.

Imagine if only 1% more people in the World practiced this! There would be less conflict and love would grow. We all desire to be heard. So, let's take time this week to work on our listening skills. I'd recommend that each day for the upcoming week you spend at least 2 minutes in silence focused on your breath. See if you can get your mental chatter to slow down a bit. Fill your lungs with breath and shift your own energy. Practice this on your own first. Then, if you find yourself in an intense conversation with another person, practice it again. Quiet your mind and practice moving your thoughts out of the way so you can receive what they are communicating to you.

Let me know how this goes! Let's be the change we want to see in the World. Let's reduce the conflict in our lives so that we reduce the conflict in the World at large.

On a side-note, please check out my updated website. It is full of wonderful resources to support you in your personal growth and well-being. My only desire in life is that more and more people see that they can move beyond suffering and become truly peaceful and happy inside.

A big hug,

Patricia Omoqui

http://www.patriciaomoqui.com/

Harness Your Power: Taker or Giver?

I share with you a concept I have been meditating on all week: Am I more focused on taking love from others or giving love to others? Take a few minutes and honestly answer this question. So many of us are so hungry for love, attention, success--we are consumed with what we can get out of life and we forget the beauty of giving!

The irony of giving is that you experience love in a deep way when you are offering it to another person. You can't help but receive when you give!

The ultimate giver is one who plants love seeds everywhere she goes: smiles, kind words, good deeds, thoughtful care put into every moment. These seeds grow into incredible flowers, leaving a trail of exquisite beauty on the path behind her. Yet, the true giver feels no need to go back and pick the flowers that have grown. In fact, the giver is so busy enjoying sharing love that she rarely looks back to see the result. Planting the seeds as she moves forward is joy in and of itself.

The flowers that bloom are merely icing on the cake of love!

To be this kind of person giving love you must fill your own heart with love. Why wait to accept yourself, truly love yourself, until another day. Start today. You are amazing, incredible -- you are here for a special purpose. You will be more effective and enjoy life so much more when you understand that loving yourself is essential to well-being. As you feel good about yourself, then you have so much more energy to enjoy others.

If you aren't very happy with yourself, then plant a seed of self-love in your heart this week.

If you do love yourself, then open to the idea of planting love seeds wherever you go this week. Don't worry about the results...just plant away! The Universe will water and grow the seeds for you.

Have fun doing your planting!

I'll be planting with you,

Patricia Omoqui

http://www.patriciaomoqui.com/

Harness Your Power: Notice Your Natural Instincts

My older daughter, Maggie, woke me up this morning at 6:50 a.m! She was full of excitement and ready to get the day started.

Yesterday when my mom came to see the kids perform in their first dance recital, she brought them each a workbook. The workbooks are full of pages that let the kids practice writing their ABCs and 123s. As Maggie went to bed last night, she was trying to write in her workbook in the dark. Finally, after some convincing, she put it under her pillow and went to sleep.

When morning arrived she had the book in her hands and asked if I'd sit with her as she did her writing. Maggie will sit for hours with these books. She is naturally inclined to do her schoolwork. She'll line up all her babies in a row and teach them everything she has learned at school. (She also sends them for time outs and even to the principal's office when they are not listening to her!)

My four year old, Skye, is totally different. Yet, she has interests of her own. The first thing she asks me now in the morning is, "What's the weather going to be like? Can I wear shorts and flip-flops?" She loves picking out her clothes each morning. She is highly focused on fashion.

Yesterday I got all dressed up for my speaking engagement. She noticed that I was wearing a dark shade of pantyhose and was desperate to have a pair of her own. Remember, she is only 4!

She also loves to dance. After the recital last night she was running around with a group of kids. I looked over and saw her doing a handstand and moving her legs in crazy ways. When I asked her what she was doing she said she was trying a new dance move.

I share these stories to illustrate that we all have natural instincts. We are drawn to the things we love. Those of us who are older may no longer feel that we are connected to activities that we feel passionate about.

When I was a kid, I would always be on the go. I loved rollerskating, riding my big wheel, and organizing the kids in the neighborhood so we could play games together. Movement was important to me--intense, physical activities was something I loved. That is still the case (though I no longer have a pair of rollerskates!)

What were you naturally drawn to as a child or teenager? Before people told you that you should, "GROW UP!" what did you love to do? If you've put fun things aside to be an adult, I challenge you to reconsider.

I've determined that it is perfectly fine to do things that allow me to really enjoy life. I'm no longer going to put the fun aside and be too serious. I want every moment of my life to be a wonderful experience. I've been rediscovering my passions and taking the time to do what I love. It feels wonderful!

I challenge you this week to think back to when you were a kid: What did you do with your time? How did you express yourself? What was fun for you? Then consider how those interests might translate into your life as an adult.

You deserve to be happy NOW! Don't postpone fun and joy...you can start to love life right now.

As I finish writing this, Maggie is trying to convince Skye to give her the workbook Gram brought her. Somehow, I'm sure, Maggie will win this negotiation and have another workbook at her disposal for the day.

Be as unrelenting as my children in going after you want:)

With all my love and support,

Patricia Omoqui

http://www.patriciaomoqui.com/

Harness Your Power: Give Thanks For Earth Angels

Yesterday I woke up and was sick. I haven't felt that bad physically in years. I give thanks for the experience because I was cared for so nicely by my daughters and my mom (the photo here is my Mother, Gayle Dulcey). Chicken soup, seltzer water for my tummy, and time for rest all helped me to feel better. My daughters kept coming and asking me if I was feeling better. When I couldn't take the questions, they were quiet and just snuggled close to me. I am blessed.

Have you ever noticed just how many Earth Angels show up along your path? I am coming to appreciate these wonderful people who give me kindness.

Take time today to drop an Earth Angel in your life a thank you note or give them a call. By acknowledging these acts of grace, we increase the love in our World.

On another note, I must say that I am blessed with THE BEST MOM in the whole world. We celebrated Mother's Day here in the United States yesterday. As soon as my mom knew how sick I was, she dropped her plans and came to my side. She is the most giving, loving, caring person I've ever met. I am blessed to have her in my life.

I realized yesterday the job of a mother never ends. I'm 35 now and still my mom is caring for me. Of course, I do my best to care for her now too -- but, it struck me that being a mother is a lifetime assignment.

To health and Earth Angels and Mothers,

Patricia Omoqui

http://www.patriciaomoqui.com/

Harness Your Power: Stop Trying to Control Others

I want to share a quick insight to help you in your week: We CAN'T control other people. Have you noticed? People do whatever they want to do...and often, it is not what WE want them to do, is it?

Notice this week how much stress and drama you create when you try to make someone do something that they really don't want to do. Yes, we can make suggestions and offer ideas and opinions to others. Then, we need to let go. We need to allow others to follow the path that they want for their life journey. Their life is up to them and they are the only ones responsible for their experience.

Too often we think we know what is best for another person. When they don't do things our way, we get angry and disgruntled. We feel the need to lecture and push them to move in a new direction.

What if we were to trust each person to their own journey?

I've found that as I let people make their own choices, they actually do fairly well. I make suggestions and lovingly share my perspectives, but then I believe that they will do whatever is best for them (even if I would never make the same choices.)

It is a relief to stop trying to control other people. I find then when I don't focus my attention on controlling others, I have plenty of energy to focus on me. I need this energy so that I can be my best.

I'm also learning that no matter what other's decide to do (even the people most intimate with me), I can always choose to be happy and empowered. I'm never stuck in any situation. I am always guided as to a way forward. More and more I am coming to realize that I don't NEED others in my life...I enjoy having people in my life and I love interacting with others and sharing love. However, I am whole in and of myself. The less needy I feel, the more I can give others the space they need to be themselves.

I have also realized that decisions that other people make are about THEM not about me. So, if someone rejects me, says something hurtful or makes a choice that could seemingly hurt me, I realize that they can decide whatever they want. My power lies in choosing how I respond to each moment.

Just for this week tune into how often you try to control others (your children, your spouse, your friends, your lover). Watch how this drains you and causes you to worry. Open to seeing and approaching your relationships with fresh eyes.

The bird in the cage is not free. When we open the door and allow the bird to do whatever it wants, we will know if it wants to be with us if it comes back freely.

All my love,
Here to support you,
Patricia Omoqui
http://www.patriciaomoqui.com/