On Turning 65 . . .So Old, So Fast! Yes, Another Birthday. . .

This past week while on Facebook, a gentleman began to chat with me.  We exchanged the normal greetings.  Then, he brought a curious question, "How old are you?" 

I responded, "An African woman doesn't tell her age."  (For those of you who don't know, I have been married to a Nigerian man for eleven years. I have learned this response from some of my Nigerian friends.)

He persisted, "Tell me your age."

I chuckled to myself wondering why he needed or even wanted to know my age.

I replied, "Since this seems so important to you, perhaps you should take a guess."

A few minutes later a message came, "I think you are 65."

I sat astounded.  I have never had someone tell me they think I am that old.  I asked, "Did you take a look at my picture?"

He said, "Yes, you look 65 in it."

(for your reference, here is the picture

I examined my picture closely.  I don't have many wrinkles, nor do I have grey hair.  But I became curious.  I realized he was entitled to his own perspective.  Through his lenses, I must have seemed like an older woman.

I found it fascinating.  Especially with my birthday coming up.  Age is just a number.  Most importantly, is how do I feel inside myself--am I at peace, satisfied, filled with joy, living purposefully?  That is my aim no matter how young or old I appear to others.

I let the man know, "Well, I am actually about half the age of what you suggested."  I could tell he was uncomfortable.  He tried to get beyond the topic saying, "Could we please talk about something else?"

Ha ha ha ha.  He he he he.  The whole situation struck me as quite hilarious.  It still does tonight as I write.

This past year of my life has been full of profound learning and deep personal change.  I thought I might take a few minutes and list out some of the key lessons I gained.

1.  When you think you have hit an end, it is really just a new beginning.  I faced some of the most difficult personal circumstances one can imagine mid-way through the year.  I admit it--there were moments of such darkness that I felt shaken.  I wondered how I would go on and how a solution could emerge.  Yet, day after day, light and hope would show up.  It came in so many forms.  I closed one door and another bigger, more amazing door opened. 

2.  Letting go of the old is essential for what you really want to show up.  It is easy to cling to what we currently have thinking that nothing more will show up.  Or, that we will end up with something worse than we already have.  Experiences taught me that it was necessary to let go what no longer fit me, what I had outgrown.  I had to let go of the one trapeze so that I could fully embrace the next one coming toward me.  That moment "in between" trapeze swings can feel exhilarating.  And, the more I faced my fears head on, the more exciting the changes became.

I am going to finish this post later...it seems our power is going out for Hurricane Sandy any moment.

Tomorrow morning as I wake, I won't be 65.  I will actually be............................................................................................................Another year old than I am right now.  And, that feels really wonderful.  I am deeper, stronger, more courageous and joyful than I have ever been in my life.  There is much to come in this new year.  So I celebrate wholeheartedly.


With a smile,
Patricia Omoqui, The Thought Dr.

www.patriciaomoqui.com