A Note of Encouragement for the Weary

Yes, I admit it.  I am exhausted.  My plate is rather full these days both personally and professionally.  I am making sure I getting enough sleep.  Yet, I just feel worn down. 

I have been observing myself, watching my thoughts very closely.  I have noticed that if I live one small moment at a time, I am fine.  I have discovered that if I begin to think a week, a month or a year into the future, I become tired.

The beauty of Life is that the only moment I need to live is RIGHT NOW. 

I live this moment, then the next, then the next. . . as I approach life this way, I am able to flow smoothly forward.  It becomes easier when I just take one step at a time rather than wondering and worrying over the next one hundred miles of the journey ahead.

I have been spending daily time at a nearby park.  Nature has a way of renewing me.  I have been sitting and walking amongst the grandest trees and dainty flowers.  Butterflies show up on my path as do birds of many shapes and sizes.  A brisk walk cleanses and uplifts my spirit.  I am in awe of the simple treasures and miracles life offers.

So today, I give thanks for where I am.  I am where I a meant to be.  I choose to relax into that knowing and rejoice at how far I have come and how much I have learned.

I say a prayer for each of us this week, that our minds will be calm and our spirits will be renewed.

Rest and meditate on these thought-provoking quotes as you begin a new week:

"The great opportunity is where you are. Do not despise your own place and hour. Every place is under the stars, every place is the center of the world." (John Burroughs)

"Don’t be afraid to give your best to what seemingly are small jobs. Every time you conquer one it makes you that much stronger. If you do the little jobs well, the big ones will tend to take care of themselves." (Dale Carnegie)

"Inside myself is a place where I live all alone, and that's where you renew your springs that never dry up." (Pearl S. Buck)

With love,
Patricia Omoqui, The Thought Dr.
http://www.patriciaomoqui.com/

Master Basics - Then Get Fancy

The problem today is people want to use high-skill techniques before they learn the foundational skills.  To get long-lasting success, we must not take shortcuts or jump ahead in the process of learning.

Warning:  It is ESSENTIAL to master the basics BEFORE you get too fancy.

I was thinking back to my years as a basketball player.  As a 16 year old playing my first year of basketball, the coach saw how tall I was and made me a "post player."  (For those of you who don't know what that means, it means I played close to the basket and with my back facing the basket most of the time.  Think of a player like Shaq.)

My coach taught me only ONE move my first year.  It was a simple shot.  I would pivot and shoot a short bank shot.  This worked perfectly for me since I was taller than most of my opponents and I could shoot right over them and score.  Coach knew this.  If I could make this shot consistently, our team was going to score loads of points!

But I was feeling frustrated.  Players around me knew more moves!  They could do fancier moves and score points with flare. I wanted to do that.  I wanted coach to show me how to do to that too.  But he insisted that I learn only the basics and perfect this ONE type of shot before I moved forward.

So, I focused.  I shot and shot and shot.  I missed a lot of shots at first.  BUT, with repetition, I was able to use this shot and score plenty of points each game.  In fact, in my first season of ever playing the game of basketball, I mastered this shot and was on my way to becoming the league’s leading scorer.

In my next season, the coach taught me one more new move – drop step, dribble, power up to shoot. Wow! Now I had a second shot, a fancier one. I worked on that one until I could do it well and score with it.  Then I had two shots I could try out and it was exciting to have grown as a player.

At last, when I got to college, the coaches taught me some awesome moves (fancy moves with real swagga)—Up and Under, Hook to the Left, Hook to the Right--I even started shooting from the perimeter rather than just with my back to the basket.  I was prepared for this new learning because my high school coach had forced me to master the basics.  I had a solid foundation.  It allowed me to make great progress.  And, with time, I was a "flashy" player who could score with both basic moves and ones that wowed the crowd.

I am glad my first coach didn't allow me to move faster in my learning than I was ready for.  He was wise.  He knew if I became really good at the basics, I'd be able to easily grasp the exciting moves.  I didn't like how slow he was moving in teaching me, but I see now, that his approach was the right one for my overall growth as a basketball player.

Be patient as a learner.  Understand the basics and practice hard until you are sound at what you do (whether that is a sport, education, career or running your own business).  Learning takes time.  To gain a level of excellence in anything you do, you must work hard at it and remained focused.  Complete the stage of growth you are in and do your best at it because it is preparing you for your next level of performance. 

If you skip essential learning and try to bypass the next steps of your growth, you may sabotage your long-term success. 

Do not be worried you aren't growing fast enough.  Instead, follow this wise Chinese proverb:

"Be not afraid of growing slowly; be afraid only of standing still."

Steady, focused, persistent, determined, dedicated, willing to practice, giving it your all, striving for excellence:  this can be your focus for the week.  It certainly is going to be mine!

Have a blessed and joyful week ahead.
I'm here to support you in your personal and professional growth.

I am only ever an email away.
Patricia Omoqui, The Thought Dr.
http://www.patriciaomoqui.com/

Don't resist Life - FLOW!

"Seek not that the things which happen should happen as you wish; but wish the things which happen to be as they are, and you will have a tranquil flow of life”

Epictetus quotes (Greek philosopher associated with the Stoics, AD 55-c.135)

When the river of life is pushing you forward and you decide you aren't going to move, you are going to be exhausted from struggling to stay where you are.  If you try to swim upstream against the flow, you won't get anywhere.  How do I know?  Well, many times in my life I have fought with the river of life.  I don't do so anymore.  I have learned my lessons.

In the past week there was both an earthquake and hurricane Irene in my area.  Was it fun?  No.  But it was an experience.  As I woke my children in the middle of the night because a Tornado warning sounded for our area, I took them downstairs to a safe place.  I sat in the silence calmly giving thanks for each one of them.  A moment of truth:  my children are alive, healthy and even in the discomfort of a horrible storm, we have each other.

No matter the challenge or the seeming inconveniences life brings our way,

there is learning to be found in every moment.

So, why not stop resisting what life brings your way and instead GO WITH THE FLOW?

Learn.  Grow.  Gain as much from the moments of life as you can. 

I have found that when things don't seem to be going my way, it is the time I must pay the most attention:  I am being taught something essential for the next stage of my journey.

Flow, flow, flow as life brings you forward.

Patricia Omoqui, The Thought Dr.
http://www.patriciaomoqui.com/

Thoughts on Ten Years of Marriage

Words that come to mind as I celebrate ten years of marriage:

Determination.  Ups.  Downs.  Highs and lows.  Great memories.  Tough ones.  Breakdowns.  Breakthroughs.  Love.  Patience.  Acceptance.  Compassion.  Growing understanding.  Space to allow the other to be.  Maturity on both parts. Learning to listen without defense.  Learning to speak one's mind when needed.   Greater appreciation of one another.  Belief in each one's potential.  Willingness to give 100% support to individual visions and a joint vision for life. 

Wow.  Ten years of marriage.  TEN YEARS OF MARRIAGE.  It means I have grown and learned a lot.  It means I have a better appreciation for the union of marriage.  It shows that I still have a lot to learn, a long way to go. 

Today, however, I just simply celebrate. I delight in the person I have become because of the loving support my husband has offered me through the years.  He has always encouraged me to follow my heart and to live my dreams.  He knew I could face my fear and self-doubt and be amazing as I lived my purpose. He has offered me wisdom, support and inspiration when I have been at my most difficult points.

I am blessed, blessed beyond measure. 

I say to anyone who is early in your marriage -- hang in for the ride of your life.  Anyone who says marriage is easy is not telling the truth.  It is hard work.  It is difficult and challenging.  Marriage requires a daily commitment.  It is a choice to stay together through thick and thin, through some of the toughest times you can imagine.  I am so glad to have made it to this point.  The depth of my love for my husband is greater than I could ever have imagined.

My prayer is to be the best wife, mother and person I can be. 

Have a blessed week.
May you find and cultivate the love your heart desires (whether you are single or whether you are currently married).

Insights from Travels

It has been a few weeks since I had the time to sit down and write a blog.  The past month was full of travel for me.  I made stops in Accra (Ghana), Lagos and Abuja (Nigeria).  I met wonderful people. I had the chance to engage with many men and women that I mentor.  I was invited to share some of my favorite topics with audiences like Harness the Power of Your Mind and Clarify Your Purpose and Live It.  It was a delightful, rich time of service, work and play.

As I sat in Abuja one Sunday night waiting to go up on stage to address an audience at Holyhill Church Ideas! Forum, my mind flashed back to 2007.

I saw myself sitting at my corporate desk in tears, wanting so much to be free to live out my passion and purpose.  I was so hungry for change.  I yearned to be free.  During those long years of soul-searching, I eventually connected to my calling as a speaker, success coach and writer. 

Yet, after I found my calling, I faced fear after fear.  The fears would rise up and tell me that my dreams were impossible.  For some reason, I found the courage to ignore my fears and I carried on day-after-day, choosing to take little steps forward.

Each tiny step that I took had led me to the night in Abuja.  I spoke that night on the importance of finding and living your purpose.  And, what I said came from a deeply authentic place--I was living what I was teaching.

I am in awe of this journey.  The more that I forge ahead, the more wonderful it becomes.  It is not free of issues and challenges.  In fact, I have many more of them now than I did even a few years back.  I feel more joy and peace now even in the midst of difficulty because I know who I am and what gifts I am here to share with the world.

Tears came to my eyes that night in Abuja.  They were tears of gratitude and amazement.

Each of us can take the time to find our deeper life calling.  It takes some effort and some soul-searching.  But, the payoffs of doing this inner work are life-long. 

If you want to dig deeper into the topic or learn more, my book is a great resource.  (You can purchase it on Amazon  http://www.amazon.com/Clarify-Your-Purpose-Patricia-Omoqui/dp/0982912900 ).  Or, I am here for you as a coach to guide you through the steps you need to take to create a life of deep satisfaction and meaning.

I pray this week that you experience a greater sense of possibility in your life than you ever have before.

With love,
Patricia Omoqui, The Thought Dr.
http://www.patriciaomoqui.com/

Keep Growing: Observe, Listen, Learn

I am on an interesting journey and I am having a great time. Arrived in Lagos (Nigeria) a week ago.  Headed quickly to Accra (Ghana) to speak at a conference.  Will travel next weekend to Abuja.

I love travel.  It is a stretching experience--from waiting in line for hours getting through immigration to dealing with a taxi driver who wants to charge me twice as much as a local--it is all LEARNING.

I am fascinated by life.  I am in awe of my journey.  And, I desire to keep growing every day.

My desire is to keep my eyes wide open and OBSERVE.  

"What is really going on here?"  I ask myself.  "Why are things the way they currently are?" and

"Is there a way this could get better and develop more?"

As I take my morning walk in Lagos, I notice the trash scattered on the road and wonder, "How could this be cleaned up?"  I see there are plenty of people who want to work.  I see the trash trucks sitting by the side of the road not in use.  The pieces of the puzzle all seem to be there.  I pray and know that there will be a time when it all comes together into a workable solution.

I have been purposefully quiet this past week.  I am doing my best to LISTEN.  Young and old have many experiences to share.  I ask questions to draw out this wisdom.  As I do, I smile.  I have much to gain from the perspectives and ideas others offer.  God brings me the right learning partners at the perfect time. 

Treat each conversation you have as a precious opportunity to develop yourself.  Consider these words of Coach John Wooden, "Others, too have brains.  A leader listens.  Don't act like you're listening when you're just waiting to talk.  People know when you're not hearing what they say.  Sometimes we forget that we're not the only smart person in the room." 

Your challenge this week: 

Be open to learning.  Be ready to grow.  Take off your blinders.  Look at life closely.  Be full of wonder in your day-to-day experiences.  Pray for a fresh perspective.  Be willing to see the world around you from new angles. 

Wishing you a fantastic week of personal development!

Patricia Omoqui, The Thought Dr.
http://www.patriciaomoqui.com/

Patience & Maturity

We are in a rush.  We want it NOW.  "Why has my dream not come to fruition yet?  I am trying so hard."

I have felt this.  I have heard it from clients, friends and family. 

"Am I doing something wrong?  Am I off track?  What am I missing here that is causing this delay?"

This sure has gone through my mind the past few years.  And, I hear people around me doing the same soul searching.

The irony:  every moment, every experience, every step, every waiting period, every challenge--is ESSENTIAL!  It is not optional to S-K-I-P steps. 

To get to the breakthrough, to have the culmination of your vision, you must be willing to be persistent and stay the course no matter how things appear.

There is Infinite Wisdom in the Grand Design of Life.  How beautiful it all becomes and how interesting it is when we KNOW that every circumstance is for our highest good and for our personal growth.

If you truly believed the above statements, how might your approach to your daily journey change for you?  Would you be more relaxed?  Would you feel greater peace?  Would you not be so hard on yourself? 

Maybe, just maybe, if you do your best and stay focused, the rest happens at a natural pace.  And, perhaps your satisfaction and enjoyment of the entire journey would increase exponentially if you knew that YOUR LIFE IS ON SCHEDULE. 

You are maturing.  With each moment, growing more and more.  Invest yourself where you are.  You may want to be on the big stages with the grand audiences -- and that will come.  But for now, use your skills where you are and with the audiences in front of you.  This time period allows you to further develop, to be truly prepared for the BIG BREAKTHROUGHS.

Be patient.  Trust the process.  Know that you are maturing.

All is well.
You are on schedule.
Simply live one moment at a time and do your best.

Written from the depth of my spirit and my experience,

Patricia Omoqui, The Thought Dr.
http://www.patriciaomoqui.com/