Beware of Guilt Darts -- Prepare and Protect Your Energy

You are on the path to amazing transformation.  You've been challenging your status quo.  You have been saying yes to more of your dreams and no to the energy vampires in your life.  You feel good, even high on life, because of the inner and outer progress you have been making.

Then, suddenly, someone you know--maybe someone close to you or maybe a co-worker--they throw the sharpest, pointiest guilt dart at you in an attempt to burst your bubble.  They don't like the fact that you've changed or progressed.  They can't stand to see an increase in your peace and joy.  They want you to stay a match to their gloomy, dark energy.  They want you to stay stuck with them in trudging through each day.  They want you to keep complaining with them over a beer at happy hour.

Will you become deflated when a guilt dart hits you?  Will you begin to question yourself?  Will you go back to your old patterns and join them again?

Guilt darts are meant to deter your progress.   Whether consciously or not, people get jealous of transformation.  They also get sad and begin to miss your company.  They can't understand why you'd choose to use your energy on personal progress rather than hanging out with them doing what you've always done.  

Guilt darts are thrown toward you in an attempt to penetrate your spirit.  But, this needn't be the outcome.

These weapons of energetic disruption can be seen as a great gift!

"A gift?!?, " you ask.

YES, a wonderful gift in disguise. These subtle or blatant attacks merely offer you a question to answer:  Am I going to stay committed to my new path and my new choices?  Or, do I feel a desire to backtrack to who I used to be or repeat the same debilitating patterns that caused me suffering?

Most likely, you'd answer a big, fat:  "NO!" to the second question.  So, rather than getting thrown off by these verbal stunts, leverage these situations to make a clear, loving statement to yourself.  Or, even better, you can be prepared to verbalize some new thoughts to others if you feel guided to do so.

Your responses when the darts are hurled your way could go something like this, "Thanks for sharing your thoughts with me.  I'm on a new path, one of self-discovery and personal liberation.  My choices are different and they are allowing me to be a better version of myself in the world.  You might not understand these new expressions of me.  If you truly care about my well-being then I ask for your support and understanding as I experiment and grow, and as I navigate these exciting changes.  I'm committed to my growth.  I encourage you to be committed to yours as well.  Let's find new levels of personal liberation together."

The other party may look at you with bulging eyes as you respond.  They may get angry at your response.  They may run the other way.  Or, they may be sparked to see you in a new light.   They may even be inspired to get more focused on their own progress!

But really, how they respond or what they do is not your business--it's their business to take care of.  And, really the only business you need to attend to is to stay steadfastly focused on growing into your full potential.  They are entitled to doing life the way they want and so are you.

So, the bottom line of all this is:  Don't be surprised if people want you to revert back to your old version.  It's normal.  Few people like change.  There will be attempts to control you and manipulate you back to being who you used to be.  It's all par for the journey of transformation.

Don't be shocked.  Don't be worried if these attacks come your way.  Do be prepared with clarity and a loving response.  Listen with compassion as the darts are hurled your way--remember, the other person is just feeling afraid and is missing your energy.

Keep your energy bubble intact.  Surround yourself with a protective layer of awareness.  I'm practicing all of this with you (in fact, I had a massive guilt dart thrown my way this week....but, because I was prepared, it didn't penetrate my joy.)

With a smile,

Patricia Omoqui, The Thought Dr.
www.patriciaomoqui.com